how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize