But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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