i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
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