I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize