So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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