I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize