Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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