His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize