Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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