How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize