My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
