I think i peed on brittanys purse
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize