I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
the liver wants what the liver wants
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Randomize
