he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Randomize