Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
