you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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