who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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