I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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