? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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