Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Randomize
