She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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