Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
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