you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
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