Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
The uberlube is also flammable
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
