great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
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