My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
