just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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