Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
How does it feel to date your dad?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
