its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize