Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
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