question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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