We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
This baby is an asshole
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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