It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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