Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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