She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize
