A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
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