Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize