1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
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