so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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