Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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