im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
