Me. At least after what I've been through.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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