I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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