Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
handjob tips. give me some.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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