if i can run in heels then i can drive
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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