my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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