David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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