Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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