I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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