Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.