is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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